i would change if the guy was a great rolemodel, somone i love, he loves me, idk why id have to change all of this…

perfect example: DAVID ARCHULETA!!

i almost did. when i met my husband, i was a wild and flirtatious party girl. i went out to clubs every other weekend and occasionally drank and flirted with every cute guy that walked past me. sometimes i would do it just to get his phone number and throw it away. i was CRAZY!! lol!!

my husband has always been the quiet, conservative, anti-social type. when we met, it was at a time in my life that i knew i needed to slow down and start thinking about settling down. so that’s what i did. he asked me 4 times to marry him. the first thing i said to him was "i’m not mature enough to be anyone’s wife".

the 4th time he asked me, i was living in new york and he was in georgia. he drove all the way to see me for christmas because i couldn’t get off for work. he brought me a box full of presents….more than i’ve ever had in my life! he was there for me when i was going through rough times, so i figured "maybe i can change for him".

about 6 months after we were married, i realized i couldn’t change. i tried doing it his way….staying home with him on the weekends, stopped drinking completely, not hang out so late at night….but i just couldn’t do it. i loved him, but we were just way too different. we’re even 2 different religions!

we’ve been married 3 years now and are contemplating divorce. but there’s no animosity. we still love each other, but we realized that we just cannot make it work. everybody tells us that we’re newlyweds and everything will work itself out, but we are going through things that married couples should NEVER go through. honestly, i cannot completely be myself around him….EVER. he thinks i’m a perfect angel and i’m about to go insane!!

we’re still together, but it’s only a matter of time before we get those papers drawn up. i’m dreading it, but i know it needs to be done in order for us to have peace between us. i know this was a lot more than what you asked for, but i just had to speak my mind.

probably not.
because ultimately, wouldn’t i be unhappy being that way?
unless i get some sort of sadistic pleasure of making someone else feel happy while i feel miserable.
plus, there’s no reason why a relationship like that should last. a stable (not necessarily perfect) relationship revolves around compromise and acceptance. changing yourself completely is just toying around with one of the foundations that make relationships last. ): so um, no thanks.

Never. You shouldn’t have to change yourself for a man to stay with you, if he doesen’t want you for who you are then he doesen’t really want YOU.

of course not
if he doesn’t love me for who i am, i’m not changing myself to make him change his mind

if he doesn’t love me for who i am and wants me to change, than obviously i’m the one thats too good for him..

snooty, i know, but thats how i see it =b

Dont change yourself…….be yourself…..no one is worth changing for. they dont appriciate you.

no.

depends on what you what? Have you ever thought of breast implants, or is it his idea? have you wanted to cut your long hair and have been too afraid or does he hate it and you love it? as for the color thing, i’ve bought some things I dont really like when my boyfriend said i look stunning in it because it’s a confidence booster, if i know he thinks i look soooo hot then i like that feeling. Does orange make you feel like that? Would you have kids now because you want them or just cause he does? and as for leaving the state, compromise, move within the state, or try it, give it the benefit oft he doubt, change can be great. you could always tell him later that its just too much you miss your family.

oh lord honey no! Listen if he really cares for you, he would love you for you and think your the most beautiful woman in the world! he wouldnt want you to change yourself! Besides what counts is if you are going to be happy with yourself after the fact. I mean seriously what "IF" you did change yourself for him and one day you look back and you realize how dumb you were for doing it and then you spend a long time regretting it… I dont know about you, but I dont think I would be happy with my life at all if I changed who I was just to suite someone elses needs. You might really end up messing your life up… If your not ready for kids, dont have them, dont cut your hair and dont change your looks if thats not what you want. Wait until YOU are ready. 1 yr is nothing! just wait until its 20 and then look back =]
**Hope I helped!**Good Luck**I Wish You The Best**